How can I worry about my own self care when I am literally in an industry where I am helping others constantly with their self care? In today's society we keep getting told that we have to focus on ourselves we have to take care of yourself you can't pour from an empty cup you need to take time for self-care. The my entire career is based on caring for others I spend over 32 hours a week helping others get their self care and I help them relax and help them feel good I help treat conditions I help them feel better at the end of all that I still have to take care of my kids to be a wife friend a mother a daughter or granddaughter when am I supposed to self care? Thought about this the other day when my friend who is also in this industry who does hair was with me doing my hair from 5:30 p.m. on the song closed till midnight because that's what we do. We set aside our lives our time and we sacrifice that so then we're doing our nails we're doing our hair we're doing our self care at midnight I work night. That can't be effective self care, can it? When you're tired you're stressed and you're under the gun to get it done in a time frame how is it relaxing how is it rejuvenating? Looking at myself at the beginning of this year what can I wear my mental health is become painfully obvious that something needs to change. Maybe I need to do more self care. Maybe I need to make myself a priority. I don't know what that looks like yet. I have a place to start and I'm starting there. I've done an audit of my phone and my social media of everything that I'm affected by all day everyday and I'm eliminated a lot. My notifications on 90% of my apps I turned off. Part of me is scared. Fo MO is a real thing. I'm desperately afraid I'm going to miss out. I am petrified but the effect this will have all my friendships. But in the back of my mind I know that if it makes me better the sacrifice is worth it. That is the only way people who call themselves my friends have been connecting with me is through these social media apps then maybe it's not real. That's a scary sentence to say. That's the first time I've said it out loud. I don't know what this is going to look like in 6 months hell I don't know what it's going to look like in a week. But yesterday not checking my phone every 5 minutes not hearing constant demanding Ding and vibration it's signaled somebody was trying to get my attention was nice. For a small portion of my day I kind of felt like myself. I clean the house. I made dinner. I organized. I read. I can't remember the last time I really did those things. Maybe that's myself care. Getting myself out of the chaos that was surrounding me. My house was full of clutter and dust my clothes weren't even in the dresser. Dishes were piled up laundry was in files. Food was not cooked not prepared it was ordered. Barely treading water. Yesterday don't like someone who throw me a lifesaver and for a brief minute I just floated. I'm going to keep up with this. We'll see how it goes. The best I can do right now no promises just a small amount of try. If I can chip away this storm you might head if I can C1 ounce of clear sky ahead then maybe there's hope.